Pregnant Woman Funny Story

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A woman goes to her doctor who verifies that she is pregnant. This is her first pregnancy. The doctor asks her if she has any questions.

She replies, “Well, I’m a little worried about the pain. How much will childbirth hurt?”

The doctor answered, “Well, that varies from woman to woman and pregnancy to pregnancy and besides, it’s difficult to describe pain.”

“I know, but can’t you give me some idea?” she asks.
“Grab your upper lip and pull it out a little…”
“Like this?”
“A little more…”
“Like this?”
“No. A little more…”
“Like this?”
“Yes. Does that hurt?”
“A little bit.”
“Now stretch it over your head!”

Pumpkin. Pumpkin. Pumpkin.

Decorated my pumpkin for Halloween.  Since Ben is not so into holidays the past couple of years and my grandsons do not come over that often, I don’t decorate like I use to, but I really like the mice and pumpkin idea.  A bit like Cinderella instead of Halloween?  Oh well.

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I cleaned my baking cabnet out and found two boxes of cake mix that expired a month and two months ago so I made two cakes today.  Pumpkin Spice cake:

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Mix at medium speed one box Spice Cake Mix, 1 15 oz can pumpkin, and 3 eggs.  Pour into 13×9 baking dish and bake at 325 degrees for 40 minutes.  Sprinkle with powdered sugar and serve.

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Pumpkin Angel Food Cake:

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Beat 1 package Angel Food Cake mix with 1 15 oz can pumpkin and 1 tsp. pumpkin pie spice on low speed until blended then for 1 minute on medium speed.  Pour into greased fluted pan.  Bake at 325 degrees for 40 minutes.  Immediately turn onto plate.  No glass bottle needed.  Cake will not rise as an Angel Food cake would.

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A Hamburger Helper

I use a potato masher to make my ground meats perfect for gravies, dips, and sauces.  Works great!

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Last days of warm weather here in Missouri so we are grilling a lot. Easy grilled chicken is just marinading frozen boneless, skinless chicken breast in Zesty Italian Salad Dressing (just enough to cover the chicken) overnight (or freeze the chicken in the dressing and it will marinade as it defrosts).

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Grill and it is perfect!  Great with pasta salad or baked potato and a green salad.

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My friend is decorating her spare bedroom in orange and hot pink.  Looks better than it sounds. I found these lamps at Hobby Lobby and Alice loved them!

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She has this gorgeous orange couch and love seat (very retro!) so I am working on an aghan shaped like a huge hot pink star to contrast with the rectangles and squares of the couch.  I think it will be a great Christmas present.

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Very simple pattern of shell stitches that can be found on Ravelry here.

 

Look What I Found! 2

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Find your perfect color here and get 50% off your first order

 How to do a reverse search and see if your photos are being used on another blog.

Wordmark.it  All you need to do is enter in the phrase you want to write and hit the “load fonts” button.  It will then show your phrase in every font you have loaded on your computer.  EVERY FONT.

An Antique Pattern Library that has some really awesome stuff for all needlework!

How to turn your Pinterest boards into PDF or JPEG image so that you can refer to them off line.  

Spice Jar Labels and Templates to print.  Lovely!

I’ve been using the Walmart Savings Catcher app since July and so far I’ve got $3.53 back in savings.  We probably spend $300 to $400 a month at Walmart on food, cleaning supplies, pet supplies, and odds and ends.

And finally:

 Get free prints for a year and more on the new Snapfish App!  It has to be a new email address to get the free prints for a year, but my daughter in law already got her free 100 prints for this month so it is worth it.

Apple  or Google

 

 

 

Crock Pot Cream Cheese Chicken Recipe

I tried this Crock Pot Cream Cheese Chicken Recipe and we all really liked it.  The bow tie pasta was a great idea.  Good texture.  Next time I’m going to remember to add a couple of tablespoons of butter to the pasta before adding the sauce.  Rachel Ray says that adding butter to the pasta helps the sauce to cling to it.  I’ll also make a double batch to freeze one and serve one.

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Cream Cheese Chicken {Crockpot Recipe}
Author: Kimberly
Recipe type: Crock pot
Prep time:  5 mins
Cook time:  5 hours
Total time:  5 hours 5 mins
Serves: 6
1-2 lbs. boneless, skinless chicken breasts (frozen) 2 cans of cream of mushroom soup 1½ cups chicken broth 2 cloves of garlic, minced 1 packet of Italian dressing mix ½ block of cream cheese Pasta of your choice or rice
Ingredients
  • 1-2 lbs. boneless, skinless chicken breasts (frozen)
  • 2 cans of cream of mushroom soup
  • 1½ cups chicken broth
  • 2 cloves of garlic, minced
  • 1 packet of Italian dressing mix
  • ½ block of cream cheese
  • Pasta of your choice or rice
Instructions
  1. Place chicken, broth, soup, garlic, and dressing mix in the crock pot
  2. Stir slightly to break up the soup and mix all the ingredients together
  3. Cook on low for 4-6 hours (mine was done in 4 hours) or until chicken can shred with a fork
  4. Remove chicken and shred; place back in crock pot
  5. Add small chunks of cream cheese and mix slightly
  6. Cook on high for 30 more minutes to melt the cream cheese.  Serve over pasta or rice.
  7. Freezer instructions: Prepare it following the instructions above, then let cool completely
  8. Pour into gallon-sized ziploc bags and lay flat to freeze
  9. When ready to eat, thaw overnight in the fridge
  10. Pour contents of bag into a saucepan and heat on low-medium heat until heated through

Crocheting for my Little Ones

Izzy is sporting an orange crochet collar this month, but I’m going to crochet one more collar with cotton yarn then decide if that will work because using sport, regular, and baby yarn just fuzzes up too quickly on my cat.

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This little guy is my 2 yo grandson and he’s a handful, but such a little lover.

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I just finished a crochet dump truck rug for his bedroom.

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Instructions:

Dump Truck Rug
SiZe: Approximately 36″ x 19″
Materials: . 8 ozs. (452 yds.) worsted weight yarn in Red . 8 ozs. (452 yds.) worsted weight yarn in Black . 8 ozs. (452 yds.) worsted weight yarn in Blue . 8 ozs. (452 yds.) worsted weight yarn in Yellow . 1 size K (6.5 mm) crochet hook or size needed to obtain gauge . 1 stitch marker . 1 tapestry needle GaUge: Rounds I – 6 :3″, 6 sc : 3″, Rows I *7 :3″
lnstructions
Stitches Used: Chain (ch) Slip Stitch (slst) Single Crochet (sc) Single Crochet Decrease (sc dec)
BeginWork: Rug is worked using 2 strands of yarn held together.
Note: When changing colors, insert hook in next stitch or stitch indicated, yo, pull up a loop, make a loop with new color, pull new color through both loops on hook. Do not cut yarn until finished with color; keep yarn to the back or wrong side of project.

TRUCK CAB Row 1: Using Red yarn, ch 31, sc in second ch from hook, sc in each sc across. Mark as right side and bottom. (30 sc) Rows 2 – 4: Ch 1, furn, sc in each sc across. Row 5: Ch 1, turn, sc to last 2 sc, – holding back last loop ofnext 2 sc, [insert hook in next sc, yo, pull up loop] twice, yo, pull yarn through all 3 loops on hook – single crochet decrease (sc dec) made. (29 sc) Row 6: Ch l, turn, skip first sc, sc in each sc across. Row 7: Ch l, turn, sc in 2 sc, color change to Blue, sc in 17 sc, color change to Red, sc in 3 sc. (24 sc)
Pnoject Information: Our model was designed using Red Heart ^ Super hver worsted weight yam in Hot Red, Bhck, Blue and Bright Yellow. (See “An Important Note” on the insidefront cover of this book.)
Row 8: Ch 1, turn, skip first sc, sc in 2 sc, color change Blue, sc in 16 sc. color change Red, sc in 3 sc. (23 sc) Row 9: Ch l- turn- sc in 2 sc. color change Blue, sc in 16 sc, color change Red- sc in 3 sc. Row 10: Ch 1, turn- *ip first sc, sc in 2 sc, color change Blue, sc in 15 sc, color change Red, sc in 3 sc. (22 sc) Row 11: Ch l, turn, sc in 2 sc, color change Blue, sc in 15 sc, color change Red. sc in 3 sc. Row 12: Ch 1, turn, skip first sc. sc in 2 sc, color change Blue, sc in 14 sc, color change Red. sc in 3 sc. (21 sc) Row 13: Ch 1, turn. sc in 2 sc, color change Blue, sc in 14 sc, color change Red. sc in 3 sc. Row 14: Ch 1, turn, skip first sc, sc in 2 sc, color change Blue, sc in 13 sc, color change Red, sc in 3 sc. (20 sc) Row 15: Ch 1, turn- sc in 2 sc, color change Blue, sc in 13 sc, color change Red sc in 3 sc. Row 16: Ch l, turn, skip first sc, sc in 2 sc, color change Blue, sc in 12 sc, color change Red, sc in 3 sc. (19 sc) Row 17: Ch 1, turn, sc in each sc across. (19 sc) Row 18: Ch l, turn, skip first sc, sc in each sc across. Finish off. (18 sc)

FENDER (First side) Row 1: Holding piece right side facing and bottom side up, attach Red yam with a slst to first loop of beg ch (Row I of Cab). Ch 1, sc in same st, sc in 11 loops, slst in next loop. (12 sc) Row 2: Tum, skip slst, slst in next sc, sc across. (11 sc) Row3: Ch 1, turn, sc across to last 2 sc, sc dec. (10 sc) Row 4: Ch 1, turn, skip first sc, sc across. (9 sc) Rows 5 and 6: Rep Rows 3 and 4. Row 7: Rep Row 3. (6 sc) Rows 8 – 10: Ch 1, turn, sc across. Finish off at end of Row 10.

F’EIIDER (Second side) Row 1: Skip next 7 ch of begrnning ch, attach Red yarn with a slst to next ch, ch l, sc in 9 sc- (9 sc) . Row 2: Ch I, Alrq sc across to last 2 sc, sc dec. (8 sc) Row 3: Ch I, trrtr, skb firsfi sc, sc across. (7 sc) Rows 4 end 5: Rep RoYs 2 md 3- (5 sc) Rows 6 – fG Ch l,m, s ilr(N. Finish offafter Row 10.
EdgtogE Wilh tup of Cab rry md right side facing, attach Red yarn with a sls* to first sc of Row 18 (top left corner), ch 1,2 sc in sre st sc evenly down the side 27 times, 3 sc in ouner sc, sc in next 3 sc, 3 sc in comer sc, sc in edges of next 4 rows, slst evenly 23 times around inside of Fender, sc in edges of next 4 rows, 3 sc in corner sc, sc in next 3 sc, 3 sc in corner sc, sc evenly up the side 16 times, sc in next 4 sc, sc evenly up the side 12 times, 2 sc in corner sc, sc across to last sc, sc in same st as first sc. Join with a slst. Finish off
TRUCK BED Row 1: With Yellow yarn, ch 41, sc in second ch from hook, sc in each ch across. Mark as bottom and right side. (‘t0 sc) Rows 2 – l2z Ch 1, turn, sc across. Finish offafter Row 12.
FENDER (Left side) Row 1: Holding right side facing with bottom edge up, attach Yellow yarn with a slst to first ch, ch 1, sc in same st, sc in 12 chs, slst in next ch. (13 sc) Row 2: Ch l, turn, skip slst, slst in next sc, sc in 12 sc. (12 sc) Row 3: Ch l, turn, sc to last 2 sc, sc dec. (11 sts) Row 4: Ch l, turn, skip first sc, sc across. (10 sc)
Rows 5 – 8: Rep Rows 3 and 4. (8 sc at completion of Row 8) Rows 9 and 10: Ch 1, turn, sc across. Finish offafter Row 10.
FENDER (Risht side) Row 1: Skip 7 chs of beg ch, attach Yellow yarn with a slst in eighth ch, ch 1, sc in next ch, sc in 17 sc. (18 sc) Row 2: Ch 1, tum, sc across to last 2 sc, sc dec. (17 sts) Row 3: Ch 1, turn, skip frst sc, sc across. (16 sc) Rows 4 and 5: Rep Rows 2 and3. (14 sc at completion ofRow 5) Row 6: Rep Row 2. (13 sts) Rows 7 – 10: Ch I, trn, sc across. Finish offafter Row 10.
Edging: Holding piece top side up and right side facing, attach Yellow yarn with a slst to first sc of Row 12 (top left cor- ner), ch 1,2 sc in same st, sc evenly down the side 21 times, 3 sc in comsf sc, sc in next 6 sc, 3 sc in corner sc, sc evenly on the sides of sc 4 times, slst evenly 23 times around the inside of fender, sc in the side of 4 sc, 3 sc in corner sc, sc in next 11 sc, 3 sc in corner sc, sc evenly down the side 21 times, 3 sc in corner sc, sc across to last sc, sc in same st-as first 2 sc. Join with slst. Finish off.
WIIEEL (Make 2) Round 1: With Red yarn, ch2, sc in second ch from hook 6 times. Join with a slst. (6 sc) Rounds 2 and.3: Ch 1, 2 sc in same st, 2 sc in each sc around. Join. (24 sc) Round 4: Ch l, sc in same st, sc in each sc around. Finish off. Round 5: Join Black yarn with a slst to joining st, ch 1,2 sc in same st 2 sc in each sc around. Join. (48 sc) Round 6: Ch l, sc in same st, sc in each sc around. Join. Round 7: Ch 1,2 sc in same st, sc in sc, [2 sc in sc, sc in scl aolnd- Join. (72 sc) Rounds E and 9: Ch 1, sc in same st, sc in each sc around- Join. Finish offafter Round 9.
FII\ISHING Weave ends into wrong side of work. Using the photo as a guide, whipstitch Wheels to Bed and Cab, and Bed to Cab.
@ 2003, Jeanette Crews Designs, Inc. #16088 ll